Whose Responsibility is Sex Education

Conversations about sex education are often accompanied by a sense of discomfort from both young people and the adults involved in the discussion. We see this even in formal settings like schools and community organisations tasked with delivering sex education. This discomfort plays a huge role in the way young people approach conversations about sex and can inhibit them from taking in crucial information. But who is actually responsible for talking to young people about sex? Is it the role of the parents, schools or both?

There’s an argument to be had that conversations around sex and relationships should start at home. Parents and carers often know the young people best and the young people will likely feel more comfortable pausing the conversation with their parents or carers than they would a professional. This approach allows the sex education to be more continuous and grow with the young people. It gives parents and carers an opportunity to adapt the timing and content more specifically to the young persons development and needs. A lot of these conversations are already happening at home without the parents and carers fully intending to engage in a conversation about sex ed. When we teach young children about sharing and turn taking, we are creating the building blocks for conversations about consent and boundaries.

However, not all parents and carers feel equipped to take on this role and provide young people with the answers they need. Many adults feel unsure about how to answer young peoples questions. They question: what’s the right thing to say? when’s the right time to bring up certain themes? how much detail is too much detail? This discomfort, embarrassment or lack of knowledge often leads to these conversations being delayed and sometimes avoided entirely. But where else are young people expected to find these answers?

Schools play a crucial role in providing structured and guided sex and relationship education. Through their curriculum, they can ensure that all young people receive consistent and accurate information that compliments their development. They can also provide environments where young people can learn alongside their peers. Some of these topics they’ll discuss in formal education, like menstruation and healthy relationships often echo conversations they are already having at home. Unfortunately for many though, school is the only place where these topics are properly addressed.

That being said, school-based education is not without its limitations. While the UK and Ireland have clear guidance on the sex ed curriculum, the quality of teaching often varies between schools with many not prioritising enough time for sex ed specific lessons. Young people frequently report that the sex ed they receive in schools heavily focus on the anatomy and biology over real life sex and relationships content. It is also standard practice within senior schools to use teaching staff who specialise in other subjects to provide these lessons. While these teaching staff often undergo some sex ed training, it is rarely as thorough as it needs to be and often neglects supporting teachers with feeling more comfortable in these discussions.

When both schools and parents neglect to provide thorough sex education for their young people, the learning doesn’t stop. Instead young people are forced to seek the information their selfs. Often this is from unreliable sources pushing misinformation or their own agenda. This almost always leads to confusion, unrealistic expectations and even dangerous behaviours.

Framing sex education as either the responsibility of schools or parents and carers alone misses the point entirely. In reality, the most effective approach is one of unity. Schools and parents or carers working together to provide young people with the answers they need with schools providing the foundation that parents and carers can reinforce and personalise.

Avoiding conversation about sex does not protect young people, it pushes them into more unreliable sources of answers and leave them vulnerable and unprepared. Whether at home or in the classroom, these discussions play a vital role supporting young people into adulthood. So perhaps the question is not whose responsibility but rather how can we work together to ensure no young person is left without the guidance and answers they need?